Kayla Boyd, wife of NRL star Darius Boyd, has opened up about her decision to terminate her pregnancy following a heartbreaking miscarriage earlier in the year.
The 29-year-old mother of one shared her story in a blog post about New Years resolutions on her website, Adored by Kayla Boyd.
“It’s crazy to think that if I didn’t miscarry back in April last year, that we would have had our second baby in December just gone,” she wrote.
“The miscarriage really affected me, my nana passed away the week prior and I guess finding out that we were expecting was some positive news for our family. To then miscarry, it was just another sad loss that I had to deal with.
“Then on the 2nd of August I found out that we were 7 weeks pregnant. But this time it didn’t quite feel the same. For whatever reason I didn’t feel happy about it, I felt sad, I felt lost, I felt confused and I felt scared sh*tless."
Boyd, who suffered form Hyperemesis gravidarum (severe morning sickness) for almost all of her first pregnancy, says the thought of going through that again so soon would make her go "crazy".
“Willow was at an age where she was so much more full on than when she was only 6 months old when I miscarried, she was a breezy newborn so in April I was like hell yeah I can have four of these nuggets easy! But as you know, the older they get the more and more full on they become. That’s when I realised, I couldn’t do it all. I was no longer the superwoman I thought I was. But the reality for me was, I couldn’t have an 18 month old, a newborn and continue to do all the things I had committed to career-wise in 2017.
“In the end after discussing it with Darius I chose to be selfish. And I do at times feel selfish for making that decision. Especially when there are women who struggle with falling pregnant and obviously there are those who are extremely against terminations. I continue to remind myself that it was the right choice for me, and the right choice for our family.
Knowing her post would ultimately receive some backlash, Boyd preceded it by writing “This is my story, don't judge. If you don't like it simply exit,” however critics were quick to attack.
Taking to Instagram, she addressed the criticism.
“It's gobsmacking at how people misinterpret things, I did not get an abortion because I was afraid of miscarrying again, that was not the sole reason that lead me to make that choice, I had about 10 reasons,” she wrote.
“Importantly, I terminated because it wasn't the right time in my life to have another child and it was the right decision for me and my family!
“I'm sincerely sorry that my own personal choices (that don't affect any single one of you), disgust you, I apologise that it's so disturbing and I will try to keep my legs closed as told.”
The couple, who are parents to one-year-old daughter Willow, say they would love to eventually have three children and are hoping to try again in a years time.