"In the beginning of my separation, it felt as though I were in a dark closet, desperately trying to find the light or the way out," Jenna writes in her memoir Gracefully You: How to Live Your Best Life Every Day. "I was in a state of shock. One week I’d be doing really well and the next I was slammed with a whole new slew of emotions. The rumour mill was churning out story after story."
"There were many times I hid under the covers, wondering what was next," Jenna continued. "The pain hit me like a tumbling avalanche. I was completely overcome with fear and sadness. It took many moments of sitting alone with my grief to force me into surrendering to my roller coaster of a situation."
She went on to explain when she realised the relationship was over, saying that their family dynamic was no longer serving her or her daughter. "First and foremost, I had to accept the realisation this isn’t working and had moved into hurting," she said.
Jenna, who is expecting her second child with her partner Steve Kazee, also recently revealed that she found out about Channing's new relationship with singer Jessie J online while she was alone on a flight.
"I was learning things about my ex most people wouldn't have to face — and over the internet, as it was happening. There I was, on a plane, alone, finding out about his new relationship. I was blindsided," she said, per People. She added she ininitally wanted to tweet about it, but decided to handle the situation "gracefully" instead.
"Do you know how many times I've wanted to go online and write exactly what's on my mind? Thousands. My instinct is to fight back, set the record straight. What stops me every time is: ‘Choose to say what you would want yourself to live with a week from today.' Or ‘Choose what you would want Everly to read when she's older,'" she said.
This article originally appeared on InStyle Australia