So youโd rather binge on wasabi than speak publicly? Join the club โ research shows that 23 per cent of Australians fear public speaking more than death. The good news is we can all overcome (or at least hide) an aversion to speaking in public. Hereโs how:
Presenting to your boss
Thankfully, most managers donโt operate Horrible Bosses style, says professional speaker Margaret Stuart. โYour boss is a human being, just like you โ you have the knowledge, skills and ability to do your job, so respect that and relax.โ
Be courteous and a little formal: Dress appropriately for your workplace, back up your statements and claims with solid research, and trust your knowledge, urges Stuart.
Know your objectives: What do you want to get out of the meeting? Asking yourself this question will help focus your presentation. Then, list any questions to ask or topics you need to address in order of importance.
Understand the bossโs personality, time pressures and priorities: โFor example, is the bottom line most important to them? Are they most relaxed and available after lunch?โ asks professional speaker Merry Robertson. Find out, then plan accordingly.
Giving a bridesmaidโs speech
Itโs the most important day of your best friendโs life and sheโs trusting you to bring the house down. Meanwhile, youโre worrying about saying her exโs name instead of her new husbandโs. Take a deep breath, then take this advice from wedding planner Jeannie Sheppardโฆ
Be concise: No matter how entertaining, youโll lose your audience if your speech lasts for more than five minutes.
Curb your alcohol intake beforehand: A slurring speaker is never a good look.
Avoid in-jokes: While you may think secrets you and the bride share are hilarious, chances are youโll make most guests feel alienated.
Donโt blubber: A few tears are fine, but a sobbing bridesmaid will make everyone feel uncomfortable. A well-prepared speech will ease those nerves and keep the floods at bay.
Keep it family-friendly: A couple of embarrassing stories about the bride are de rigueur, but keep them light-hearted and never sexual in nature.
Say something nice about the groom: Youโre sharing your best friend with him, so donโt forget to mention him.
Playing the role of emcee
Remember, itโs not about you. Your job is to keep the action running smoothly and warm the audience to each speaker so they want to listen. Your number-one rule? โWear something youโre comfortable in and have worn before so you donโt fidget, adjust or fiddle with it,โ recommends Robyn Henderson, professional emcee and speaker.
Arrive at the venue early: Make sure you know how the microphone and any other equipment works before the proceedings kick off. Read each speakerโs profile, so you can give them a great introduction, and double-check all pronunciations and jot down tricky ones phonetically.
Talk to the speakers: Try to keep things running on time, arrange to give presenters โfive minutes to goโ and โwind it upโ signals โ and make sure you stick to them.
Donโt panic: If a loud noise interrupts the event or something unexpected happens, donโt ignore it. Everyone else will have noticed, too, so acknowledge it and then move on.
Speaking up in a meeting
Do you tend to keep your mouth clamped shut in meetings? โStay in the moment rather than trying to think of something clever to say,โ urges psychologist Victoria Kasunic.โ โIf youโre present and engaged in the conversation, youโll naturally find things to say or contribute. Itโs when you feel self-conscious and focused on yourself that you tend to hold back.โ
Relax: Focus on breathing into your belly and counting to three with each inhalation and exhalation, advises Kasunic. โWhen weโre stressed, we canโt access the part of our brain that looks after complex thinking, such as problem-solving and strategy.โ
Modulate your voice: Use a strong, medium volume, but a lower pitch than you might use to speak to friends. โWe prefer to listen to resonant voices rather than high-pitched, breathy ones, and get annoyed by voices that arenโt loud enough,โ adds Kasunic.
Stay strong: โPeople recall the first and last things you say, so start strong and donโt trail off and mumble at the end. You want to leave them with a clear, strong statement, as thatโs what theyโll remember.โ
Speaking to the media
Representing your company in the media can be a daunting experience. โBefore speaking with journalists, research them and their media outletโs background so you know what type of audience you will be talking to,โ suggests public relations consultant Catriona Pollard. โMake sure you understand exactly what theyโll be talking to you about and pre-prepare.โ
If youโre going on TV: Sit, rather than stand, and use slow, controlled movements. โThis will help with nerves, as it forces your brain to slow down,โ says Pollard. โAlso allow yourself time to think and make sure all points are brief and succinct.โ
If youโre speaking on radio: Because this medium gives the illusion of a one-on-one relationship with its listeners, adopt a friendly approach and remember to speak to or with your audience, not at them.
If youโre going to be in print: โDeliver key messages early and donโt ramble,โ says Pollard. โDuring a phone interview, stand while you speak โ it will make you feel and sound more confident.โ
Top 5 public speaking tips
We asked clinical psychologist Margaret Ross for her best confidence boosters.
1 Gently lengthen your spine so you feel taller and straighter โ youโll look and feel more confident.
2 Maintain eye contact to look more professional and poised (even if you donโt really feel it).
3 Exhale slowly to calm any signs of anxiety.
4 Smile โ it physically relaxes the body.
5 Remember, the audience wants you to do well. They want to hear something interesting, funny or pleasant.