LIFE & CULTURE

MAFS Recap: Meet The Family Goes Up In Flames

Yikes.

Another week, another set of Married At First Sight problems, right? This week looks set to be a doozy if the Booka/Brett rumours are anything to go by, and I for one am ready for some spice in this show that doesn’t involve gaslighting, thanks!

We’re back with all the couples ensconced in their serviced apartments post-ceremony. Everyone is talking about Bryce and Melissa (namely, Bryce’s toxic behaviour) but Bryce and Melissa are just out here thinking they’re the strongest couple in the experiment and enjoying a set of hoodies.

MAFS
Those who hoodie together stay together

Meanwhile, Alana is not doing well after Jason’s huge reveal that he doesn’t feel their relationship is progressing as it should. She acknowledges that while the other couples seem to be going from strength to strength, they’re in a bit of a rut.

Jaimie and Chris are also not doing so well. After all their drama at the commitment ceremony and the honeymoon, Chris says he’s had enough of Jaimie’s “lies”, saying she’s telling him one thing off-camera and another on. I feel like all of Australia is demanding justice for Chris at this point.

MAFS
This man was done dirty

But he also seemed really… fake in this conversation? If anything it felt like HE was putting on a big act for the cameras, trying to position himself as the hard-done-by groom here. Maybe it’s all the toxic dudes on this show this year but I started to feel bad for Jaimie. They were clearly a terrible match. Anyway, Chris marches off – like, not to another apartment, he vacates the premises entirely.

Jaimie’s like:

MAFS
K bye

It’s time for the new couples to do that awful game where they rate the other couples, because we’ve seen how well that went down before. Kerrie and Johnny are first, and Kerrie puts Brett in top place, saying she thinks he’s unique and quirky and she loves that vibe. Johnny’s off it.

But then Kerrie ranks Johnny as number one, so all is well. Next is Georgia and Liam, and things go well – Liam lines up the other women in Married At First Sight, before putting Georgia… second. She is not happy.

MAFS
Love this for me

He explains that it’s “neck on neck” but she’s not having it. When she does her line up, she puts Liam first and says there’s no one else in the experiment she’d rather be dating. They talk about him putting her second but they don’t really get anywhere with it.

Then it’s time to check on everyone else. They’re off to the “movies” to Zoom friends and family, because Covid. I forgot about that annoying little pandemic! Belinda and Patrick are first, and their family are quick to ask if they’re happy with the way… their intimacy is progressing? Man, I never, ever want to talk to my parents about my “intimacy”. Thank you very much.

MAFS
“I love your mum knowing about our sex life, tbh”

Basically, the families are shown the commitment ceremonies, so they have some information but not everything. This becomes apparent with the next couple, Melissa and Bryce. AGAIN, Bryce brings up how he put Melissa fourth in the hotness ranking. WHY, BRYCE. WHY DO YOU KEEP MENTIONING THIS.

MAFS
Word vomit but make it “I put her fourth”

Bryce’s mum absolutely goes in on him, saying he needs to stop “puffing around like a rooster” and getting into fights, and pay more attention to his supportive wife. She says she doesn’t know why Melissa is still standing beside him. But at the end of the day, everyone just wants to make sure Bryce and Melissa are actually happy. As always, nothing changes with these two!

Next we are gifted (not) a very alarming “intimate” massage between Patrick and Belinda, where Belinda basically punches him in the back for ten minutes. After that, Liam and Georgia make up after the hotness ranking debacle.

We swerve back to Melissa, who is dressed as an undercover FBI agent.

MAFS
Maybe this is a long game to arrest Bryce for being toxic

She tells Bryce that while she’ll take her mum’s advice, the decision to stay with him is hers. He’s all “as long as you’re happy!” and like… Bryce have you SEEN your wife lately? She is NOT happy.

Next it’s Bec and Jake’s turn to face the family, but they’ve had another blow up overnight, apparently over something small but Jake’s mainly fixated on the fact Bec told him to “shut the f*** up”, which he says is super rude. To be honest I’m like, that’s not that rude but I also feel if I was Bec I’d just bloody apologise for swearing? Like just say sorry!

Anyway, they walk in tense and things only get worse, because Bec’s mum is totally out for blood – Jake’s blood, to be exact – and won’t stop until he’s crying in a puddle on the floor, I reckon.

His own mum and sister-in-law try to get a word in but Theresa, Bec’s mum, will not stop backing her daughter – even when it’s pointed out that Bec literally said Jake was “draining the life” out of her.

MAFS
The feeling when you’ve still got 5 days to go

Eventually, Jake says they’re simply not suited and they’ve tried everything. Bec has to get the last word in, saying she’s not giving up but apparently he is. Honestly, I usually take the side of the wife in these scenarios but Bec has been so AWFUL to Jake this whole time. She’s not a horrible person – even Jake says so – but she really hasn’t been great to this guy. Anyway, they’re clearly done as of Sunday’s commitment ceremony.

Tomorrow night! More awful games that will ruin relationships!

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