Can you believe we have ANOTHER wedding tonight? How many weddings can this show force us to endure? Don’t get me wrong, I love a good Married At First Sight ceremony, but I have far too many names to remember already, OK? Stop adding more.
We first go to Kerry/Johnny and Liam/Georgia to see how their first nights together went. No one had sex but they’re all smitten. So that’s cute.
Meanwhile, Booka is mad at Brett because of some in-joke going on at the weddings last night about him being in a relationship with Patrick? Or something? She clearly felt left out of the conversation but Brett’s worried she’s too serious and gets wound up about stuff that isn’t a big deal. Have to agree with him on this one. There’s a lot of this:
Which says to me that he’s starting to doubt their relationship. Ugh is this going to be Jonethen/Connie 2.0? Please no!
Then we head to meet this extra couple. There’s some sort of Viking man who is HUGE and covered in tatts, and a woman who always goes for unavailable men. As always, I missed their names!
Jamie (the bride) walks down the aisle and while Chris (the tatt Viking) is taken aback by her beauty, Jamie is totally off his hair from the get-go – although she does at least feign happiness to his face.
Meanwhile, all the other honeymoons are going well. Like too well. There is nothing to report. It’s an abyss of happiness.
Back to the wedding, and Jamie is grilling Chris about his lifestyle. He’s sporty, she isn’t. She’s a princess, he’s a rough and ready FIFO worker. But then he makes a cute speech and she’s all like awww, but he loves family and blah blah, everything is fine now. This is definitely going to be one of those “Narrator: everything was not fine” moments though.
Joanne and James meet up and agree to try one last time to repair their marriage after he told her she meant nothing to him. Hmm, we will see how that goes. Meanwhile, Kerry and Johnny get into an intense convo about something but I got bored and didn’t listen, because it was boring.
Meanwhile, Georgia and Liam get the honesty box out but everything goes smoothly because they’re PERFECT. Even when Liam says he’s had 50+ sexual partners, Georgia is unphased because she’s a woke queen. They also seal the deal sex-wise and seriously, these guys are my new faves.
Over to Viking and Jaimie, where things are going well, then okay, then bad, then horrible hellish cesspit. Basically, Jaimie can’t stop correcting Viking Guy on everything from his hair (which is bad) to how he says aks instead of ask (okay kinda mean to point that out relentlessly). He gets mad and storms off to the toot.
He comes back and tells us that he just feels a bit shit when she constantly points out his faults, which is fair enough. He then, quite maturely I might add, points this out to her and she seems to understand which is good progress!! John would be so proud!!
Maybe these new couples will be the healthy relationship energy we need on this show – because tomorrow night! Dinner party! Bryce’s secret external girlfriend getting called out! Good times.
