This week’s episode, ‘Trick Or Treat’, opens with some excellent news: the cracks in Miranda and Che’s relationship are starting to show. To them, I mean. We, of course, have known it was terrible since Miranda first screamed at Che for giving her son drugs.
Alas, now the honeymoon phase is over folks, and all that’s left is one partner going to bed when the other is waking up. (Um, metaphors much?)
Before we get into episode 5, you can catch our recaps of previous eps here:
And it goes without saying: SPOILERS AHEAD!
What Do The ‘And Just Like That’ Characters Dress As For Halloween?
Excellent question. Glad you asked.
Carrie, hilariously and perfectly, is dressed as Helen Gurley Brown — the pioneering editor of the OG sex-positive magazine, Cosmopolitan. Carrie’s homage is perfection. And by that, I mean it’s not at all accurate, but the writers went meta-intellectual with this one, plus we get to see Carrie back in fuschia.
Miranda is not in costume but is, however, slaying the autumnal dressing brief: the chunky knit, the purple scarf, the slouchy boots, the power-clashing stripes? It’s a 10/10 (for everything BUT a Halloween party).
Charlotte and Harry are couple dressing as Keri Russell and Matthew Rhys from a TV show that ended five years ago. These two exemplify a Halloween reference gone bad. If it’s not campy and current, and you look like an average couple doing their groceries – stop, go back for something has gone wrong. Also, the costume team needs to apologise to Matthew Rhys for Harry’s ‘Matthew Rhys’ wig that looks NOTHING like any hair Matthew Rhys has ever had. Harry and Charlotte, however, continue to remind us that they are the OG happy couple on this show, and cannot be touched by drama. (Seriously, if anyone tries, we will riot.)
Nya is dressed as a Catwoman and I do find this a little unbelievable for her character – even when they try to reference Eartha Kitt, i.e. the thinking woman’s Catwoman. But she looks fab and is entering into her single and slutty era. So, god speed, Nya!
Seema is dressed as herself.
Then there’s Ms Lisa Todd Wexley, AKA LTW. Could this goddess be more divine? (Nicole Ari Parker — where did you learn to dance?!) LTW is busy busting a move on the dancefloor while dressed as a Vivienne Westwood-esque Bride of Frankenstein — I want her to be my friend so bad. I don’t care how unbelievable it is that she exists on planet earth — she is amazing and I want to hit some charity ball dancefloors with her and then maybe just stare at her face a while.
What is a penis pump? (Seriously, I didn’t know!)
The next scene takes us to drinks with the gals (Nya, Seema and Carrie) at the place to meet eligible singles: a swanky hotel bar.
I put it to you, reader, is this a thing? Is this a New York thing? Are sophisticated singles drinking (and, more importantly) picking up in hotel bars when they’re not staying at said hotel? Asking for a friend…
Seema “hooks a fish” and I nearly fall off my chair because he looks A LOT like Christopher Nolan. You know, the famous and ‘very serious’ director of such projects like Dunkirk, Interstellar and Oppenheimer?
Well, IYKYK…And IYK, it’s by far the funniest thing this show has done in 1.5 seasons.
Flashforward and ‘Christopher Nolan’ surprises Seema by introducing a penis pump into their evening. By all means, go forth and pump if you want to, but I genuinely thought penis pumps were exclusively a gag from Austin Powers. I was wrong.
By the end of the episode, we find out ‘penis pump gin guy’ is fine with his machinery but can’t hack a vibrator.
And just like that, another one bites the dust…
Carrie Meets a Tall Dark Stranger
Carrie, distracted by Seema’s penis pump story, stops in a bike lane and is hit by some jerk who can’t seem to find his brakes. I think New Yorkers might need to break-down the bike rules to me but I just wasn’t aware standing in a bike lane in NYC is punishable by death. Like, just brake dude.
Anyway, the jerk in question is played by Peter Hermann – who I only know as ‘The Hair’ from 30 Rock. (Ding: Very important pop culture reference!) Fun fact: While Googling ‘The Hair from 30 Rock’ to find his real name, I also found out he’s been married to Mariska Hargitay, legend of the small screen and star of Taylor Swift’s ‘Bad Blood’ music video. (They’ve been married for nearly 20 years too. Amazing! You’re welcome.)
The Hair and Carrie flirt a little and then, because she’s thirsty as winter skin, she turns up on his doorstep with three different kinds of soup. This, of course, leads to making out. I love this for Carrie who we all know loves herself a giant white man. Enjoy your tall drink of pea soup, girl!
Meanwhile, The Hair is repeatedly cock-blocked by the petulant child he calls a business partner. He’s not really a child (behaviourally, yes. Chronologically, no), but he has a tiny diva attitude and makes it clear he would have thrown Carrie on a fire if this was the 1692.
When the grumpy business partner later interrupts Carrie’s chance to do The Hair, Carrie does my favourite thing she’s ever done: She commando rolls off the bed and duck walks out the room.
Let it be immortalised in (web)print that when some random guy ruins your make-out sesh, bites your head off, and then starts to monologue at you about how hard his life has been, this is only appropriate course of action.